Trust Fund Pirates
"Trust Fund Pirates" is the twenty-first and penultimate episode of Miami Vice's second season. The episode premiered on May 2, 1986. Summary Crockett & Tubbs team up with a semi-retired smuggler to help solve a rash of smuggler killings off-shore. Plot Captain Hook (Richard Belzer) runs a outlaw radio station off the coast, joined by "Noogie" Lamont (Charlie Barnett). While his music goes across the ocean, a smuggling boat out of Cartagena, the Mas O Menos, manned by a dealer named Moralez, is waiting for a pilot named Jackson to pick up a load of contraband (cocaine). During this time, a U.S. Customs boat appears and begins opening fire on the boat, killing everyone aboard. The Customs boat is manned not by agents, but by "pirates", led by Skip Mueller (Perry Lang), who board the boat, pour rum on the dead bodies, and steal the cocaine located in a hidden compartment. The smuggler Jackson Crane (Gary Cole) then arrives on the boat, finds the carnage left behind, that the drugs were taken, and then takes the ship's SONAR device. Castillo said the Customs boat was hotwired and abandoned in the Florida Keys, and wants Crockett & Tubbs to check out Switek & Zito's sting operation in Broward and see if the stolen SONAR equipment turns up. It turns out it did, sold by a former B&E specialist named T.R. "Jumbo" Collins. Crockett & Tubbs (as Cooper & Burnett) go to check him out at his trailer located in an aviation junkyard. Both Jumbo (Tommy Chong) and his wife, Fluffy (Denny Dillon) think that the duo are with Mueller. After a weapon showdown, Crockett & Tubbs find out Jumbo got his SONAR equipment from a pilot through an intemediary--Captain Hook. Crockett & Tubbs then go to see Hook on his boat, he said he arranged delivery with Jackson, the pilot Jumbo mentioned. When they get to the hangar, Jackson mentions how he heard of "Burnett & Cooper" from Jimmy, the smuggler pilot who used to own the hangar, and doesn't want to do any business with them. Mueller arrives with his gang of pirates at Jumbo's place and wants to sell the cocaine stolen from the boat to Jumbo. But it's a rip-off, and the Collins' escape in a hail of gunfire, then the pirates find out the money for the drugs was counterfeit. Crockett & Tubbs want Jackson to introduce them to the pirates they are looking for to arrange transport of MAC-10 weapons to South America. Jackson introduces Lani (Nicole Fosse), his fiancee and asks Crockett & Tubbs to show her a good time at an video arcade and a restaurant. They find Lani is a trust fund baby and that Jackson is aware of the multi-million trust fund she will inherit when she is 22. Meanwhile, Jackson goes to a rundown building to meet the pirates, but is confronted by Moralis' brother and gang, who blame Jackson for his brother's death. Mueller and the pirates arrive to dispose of Moralis' brother's gang. The pirates are also trust fund babies who are bored with the aristocratic lifestyle and can't stand the South American drug dealers that arrive and "ruin things for real Americans like you & me", and Lani is Mueller's sister. Jackson is hesitant to arrange the meet with Crockett & Tubbs, but the pirates want it to happen, and so does Crockett & Tubbs, so they finalize everything in the hangar: Jackson will fly Crockett & Tubbs to the pirate boat with the money & weapons, then the boat will be used to transport the arms to South America. Castillo doesn't like the idea (no backup once Crockett & Tubbs are on the plane) but they go ahead with their plan. At Lani's place, Jackson is worried about "Cooper & Burnett" and Lani is worried about the wedding dress she will be wearing in six weeks. At the hangar, Jackson brought Lani with him and he wants to back out of the deal, but Lani pulls a gun and wants the deal to go through, saying her brother warned her that Jackson "would flake out", and they take Crockett's & Tubbs' guns, and board the plane. They arrive at the Meuller mansion and the pirates open the box of arms and find it's a fake, in the melee Crockett & Tubbs shoot all the pirates except Meuller, who Jackson shoots with a flare gun, and they arrest Lani. Jackson is disgusted with "trust fund babies", unhappy he helped cops, but he will get back to Crockett's offer about a clean slate since he did help them. Captain Hook signs off for the day on his radio show. Notes * Richard Belzer would go on to play the role of Detective John Munch in Homicide: Life on the street from 1993-1999 and on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit from 1999-present. * This is Charlie Barnett's only second season appearance as "Noogie" Lamont, though he was mentioned in passing in "Buddies" when his wife, "Ample" Annie, speaks to Crockett and Tubbs. Allegedly, Don Johnson refused to do scenes with Barnett, and had him banned from the set due to a drug-fueled rage. Barnett would appear one more time in the Season 4 episode "Missing Hours". * This episode is a loose sequel to the first season episode "Smuggler's Blues", as Tubbs mentions he has been here (the hangar) before, Jackson mentions that Jimmy (Glenn Frey's character) told him about Burnett and Cooper and that after the events of "Blues", Jimmy was in the hospital for two months and retired from smuggling. * The opening sequence of the episode (set to Randy Newman's "Miami") looks like a mini-music video, showing various stock shots of Miami. * Tommy Chong's long time partner, Cheech Marin, would co-star with Don Johnson on the 1996-2001 cop show Nash Bridges. Chong and Philip Michael Thomas would guest star on an episode. * Lani is playing the classic Nintendo game Mario Bros. in the arcade, which was the first in the classic Mario Bros. series. * In the opening, a woman's nude torso is visible for a few seconds. Risky for even 80s televison! Music *"Miami" by Randy Newman (opening and closing sequences) *"Heaven" by Simply Red (Jackson on boat) *"Still In The Game" by Steve Winwood (Crockett and Tubbs on Captain Hook's boat) *"Mirade" by Philip Michael Thomas (Crockett, Tubbs and Jackson in bar) *"Space Invader" by The Pretenders (Crockett, Tubbs and Lani in arcade) *"That Smell" by Lynyrd Skynyrd (Jackson looking for pirates) *"What You Need" by INXS (Jackson trying to talk Crockett and Tubbs out of the pirate deal) Quotes *"What do you guys think of my new TV show, Stolen Goodies? -- Switek to Crockett and Tubbs *"Switek, America's not ready!" -- Tubbs *"Is a frog's butt watertight?" -- Jumbo Collins to purchaser of stolen SONAR equipment *"Trust fund babies just wanna have fun!"'' -- Skip to Jackson'' *"I want 60 upfront!" "Yeah, and Gaddafi wants Reagan to visit him in his tent!" -- Skip and Crockett Category:Miami Vice Season 2 Episodes